Happy Halloween!

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I’ve written before about how much I love Halloween  because it’s the one day a year that, instead of giving me dirty looks, people say “Nice costume!” It’s really wonderful to be able to walk around dressed in Domme gear instead of having to bring it all in a bag and get dressed in the bathroom of a venue (I learned the hard way that you do not want to get pulled over by a cop while wearing vinyl because they do not like that, so change when you get there.) But on Halloween, all things are permitted.

As I have often said, I love this. I don’t slut-shame the sexy nurses, sexy kitty cats, or any other silly costume marketed to women. I don’t care that women use Halloween as an excuse to dress as something that they never normally would. In fact. I think that is great!

However this year, a reader asked me a new question that I have never even thought of before, and it kind of blew my mind. He wrote: “Do you get upset when vanilla women dress up as a Dominatrix on Halloween? Isn’t this cultural appropriation?”

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So first, I want to say that I think it’s pretty shitty when people make a culture into a costume. I have Native American friends, and I am super offended when I see someone wearing a cheap, fake headdress made out of chicken feathers and calling themselves “Chief Wanna-Bang-You” or some other disgraceful shit. Fuck people who do that.

And second, I want to agree that Kink is a culture, and that a vanilla woman dressing up as a Domme for Halloween is definitely appropriation of a culture. HOWEVER, I do not think it is offensive. Look; that might be a personal thing. Maybe I am wrong (and if so please write to me and tell me why!)

It’s just that to me, shaming someone for cultural appropriation requires that the appropriation actually does some damage. And honestly, I think kink fiction written by vanilla people (such as 50 Shades of Grey) does a lot more damage than some vanilla wife playing Domme could ever do. I just mean, I think that standard we should use when we decide if something is appropriation is: Does it cause harm? And I don’t think that a vanilla woman in a fake pleather outfit with a thin, novelty whip is hurting anyone (literally or metaphorically.)

Halloween is my favorite holiday, and I don’t want people to be dicks on Halloween. So don’t appropriate someone’s culture. Be respectful of Native Americans, Black Americans, and everyone the fuck else. But on the other side of it, don’t be a white person who wants to call people out just for fun, because those people turn Halloween into a nightmare by actively trying to get offended.

Also, do not spread all that bullshit about how stoners are going to give your kids drugs. Drugs are very expensive, and no one is going to give them away on Halloween. The Beckys who push this crap are really ruining a perfectly good holiday.

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The Politics of Dating

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The man enjoys free time while the woman cleans and cares for the baby. This is the narrative that men are pushing as “normal.”

When I was a little girl, I remember being taught a narrative by adults and the media. It was: “Girls want to get married, and boys don’t.” This was largely true in the 1980’s, because women still weren’t allowed to do most jobs, and they were paid significantly less than men for the same work. They had to get married or face extreme poverty. Without any real choice, women got married.

During my lifetime, I have seen things change dramatically. Women have a choice now. The pay gap is still there in most fields, but it is smaller. And these days, there are very few jobs that still exclude women.

Of course, the pink tax is still holding women back. And, the lack of paid maternity leave and government daycare often places and unfair burden on women (who are still overwhelmingly doing all the childcare.)

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Items for women are taxed extra, such as tampons and makeup.

However, we have come much closer to equality. As this has happened, there has also been a fundamental shift in the dating community and in which gender most hopes to get married.

According to recent studies, men benefit from marriage. They report higher levels of happiness, and they enjoy better health. Marriage is a good deal for men.

However, the opposite is true for women. Married women tend to be more overweight, and more likely to suffer from poor health and stress. In fact, divorcesource.com claims that 80% of all divorces are filed by women. This is in spite of the fact that changes in the law mean that women tend to get nothing in a divorce besides what they came into the marriage with.

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A man relaxes while a woman cleans around him.

So why are so many women refusing marriage, and so many more choosing divorce? To start with, studies show that male attitudes have not changed in spite of the shift in culture.

When I was a child, the bureau of labor reports that only about 50% of women were working. However, women are at nearly full employment now. (Excluding cults like the FLDS and the Quiverfull Movement which oppress women from childhood and force them into an endless cycle of pregnancy and birth until they die.)

What this means is that any women you date (if you are not in a cult) will be working full-time. Yet, studies show that men still expect women to do all of the unpaid emotional labor, housework, and cooking. A man who does any of these things in the course of a relationship sees it as him “helping out” instead of simply carrying his own weight like he should. The statistics get even worse once a couple has a child, and studies show that women do nearly all of the childcare, including taking days off when a child is sick.

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“The second shift” refers to married woman having two full time jobs while men only have one.

This unequal power dynamic in relationships has caused serious problems. Women are tired of having to do the same amount of work as a man outside the home, and then being expected to do all of the work inside the home (while their male partner focuses on “guy time” and leisure activities such as video games and male-oriented outings.)

How does this change the politics of dating?

Well, men are far more hostile because they are rejecting equality. Some have blamed this on the Internet, but studies show that even when men meet a woman in-person, they are more hostile towards the woman and reject the idea of feminism in a majority of the cases.

Anti-woman groups like the MRA movement and Incles have swelled in number, and the general sentiment among men seems to be that women are “just after their money.”

Oddly, this narrative is pushed in culture exclusively by men. The idea that women want money and gifts from a man is mentioned with an 86% frequency among men (showing that nearly all men believe this outlandish claim.)

Another odd thing: Men claim that women refuse to date ugly men in spite of the overwhelming prevalence in culture of ugly men with attractive women and ugly women alone.

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In culture, we actually accept fat men with skinny women. However, there are no fat women with skinny men.

(Note: If you don’t read any of the other links, read that last one. It’s about a trend called “pigging” where men find a fat girl and pretend to love her until finally standing her up publicly while shaming her for her weight. Men go out of their way to hurt fat women while women go out of their way to make unattractive men feel comfortable.)

However, women felt completely differently.

When asked how women felt about dating and what they wanted in a mate, women overwhelmingly said they wanted someone who would treat them as an equal. They didn’t care that much about looks or money. They wanted men to do an equal share of the emotional labor in a relationship, and an equal share of household tasks. They also wanted to be valued and have their time considered as important as that of their mate. And not surprisingly, straight women complained about not enough orgasms.

(That last part is not new though, as the imbalance in orgasms in straight relationships has been an issue for most of history.)

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King of Queen star is fat, while his co-star is skinny and attractive.

Research suggests that this discrepancy in what men think women want and what women actually want is entirely based on a narrative pushed by men in culture. Men are the ones telling men that women want money and status. And, when a man is confronted with an actual woman telling him what she actually wants, they often refuse to accept it.

Why does it matter? Well, there are three main reasons that this really sucks:

1. It makes dating horrible. Men are aggressive and angry, and women are sad and disappointed. This makes for a host of bullshit from stealthing to ghosting, and an increase in people being stood up for dates. It is a toxic and hostile environment that makes us all dread dating.

2. The birth rate is falling fast. This may seem like a good thing since some would argue that it is better for the planet, but it is a demographic time bomb that will leave adults now with no one to care for them in their old age. It also points to serious economic issues in the future.

3. Single men who feel unable to woo a woman tend to act out in terrible ways. Rape, murder, and terrorist attacks are all too common ways that men attack women for their right to refuse a date. This creates an unfair burden on women, who are often terrified of being raped or murdered if they go on a date or refuse a date.

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Over and over we see that fat men are supposed to have hot wives and fat women get cats.

One study suggested that part of the bitterness in male culture in modern society is that men cannot produce their own offspring. While women do not need men to create a baby (sperm is cheap,) men do need women to make a baby. Therefore, in order to have offspring, a man must be able to successful woo a woman. This is very hard for many men, since they think that all women are gold-diggers who should have to do their laundry and cook for them.

The difference in expectations in not just an American problem. Women all over the world are rejecting the idea that they should have to be masters of the home and childcare, and they are asking for partners to treat them as equals.

In many countries, this has actually let to men buying wives from third world countries so that they have financial power over their wives and can force them into a tradition gender role from 100 years ago. However, many international organizations are really cracking down on sex trafficking. It is getting harder and harder for men to simply buy a wife that they can force into servitude.

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Men buy women for as little as $1,000 from some countries and then keep their passport, forcing them to be subservient.

So, what will the future hold for us? Will dating continue to be a cesspool of bullshit that frustrates us all and continues to perpetuate a useless gender war?

As far as scientists can tell, it seems unlikely that women will give up their newfound independence. They love working, living alone, and having freedom for the first time in human history. This means it will have to be the men who cave in and agree to treat women as equals if we want relationships to work in the future. (And honestly, if you are against equality you are wrong.)

For me, I feel that there is hope. In spite of Incels, Men’s Rights Activists, and other groups dedicated to the hate and oppression of women; I do think that men will come around. I think this because when I look at the dialog going on in each camp, I see similar themes.

Feminism is constantly suggesting that patriarchy hurts men as much as it does women, and citing the issue of men being told not to express emotions and instead to repress everything.  This same thing is cited by men as something that they want to change. In fact, most things that feminists argue for are things that men say that they want. This means that if men stopped arguing for just a moment and listened to what women were saying, we could actually fix all the problems in society pretty quickly.

(Note: There is no female equivalent of an MRA. I just want to point that out because groups dedicated to hating women are big, and groups dedicated to hating men are not. Women, by and large, have simply moved on to cats and vibrators.)

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Women still don’t have equal rights, and there is little hope of seeing an equal rights amendment any time soon.

As for me personally, I identify as male but I grew up in a female body.

This has forced me to see both sides of the issue in a great deal of detail. Most of my friends are men, and I form better relationships with men (women often seem to be competing with me over things I do not understand and it makes me uncomfortable.) However, there are some things that I cannot help but see as a woman because I have to pay the pink tax for my tampons.

I think a lot of queergender folks like myself- and a lot of transgender people- are seeing both sides of the “gender war” and realizing how silly it is. It’s like one of those episodes in a TV show where if everyone just talked to each other honestly, it could have all been solved in the first five minutes. However, because no one is being completely honest, things continue to get worse.

(I always hated those episodes of TV shows and found myself screaming at the TV “Just tell him/her the truth and get it over with!!)

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Fun fact: Cats are easier to clean up after and easier to cook for. Also, vibrators make women orgasm 100% of the time.

I would urge you all to do some soul-searching the figure out what you really want out of a relationship. And, if what you want is not an equal partner in all things, then maybe you need to adjust your expectations a little until they match up with reality. Right now, women are happier with a vibrator and a cat than they are with a man, according to science. I think that will continue until men step up and do their fair share.

And remember: True equality does not mean that each person gets exactly the same things. It’s harder to be a woman. The pay gap, the pink tax, periods, and childbirth make women carry a heavier burden than men. That’s not an opinion; it’s just an objective reality.

So men: “equal” means that you put in MORE than a woman for the same amount of the credit. You will have to step up and do more than half of the work when a woman is compromised by her biology, and it is fair and right that you do that. You are lucky enough to be free from many of the burdens that women carry, and you will need to recognize and respect that.

I know it’s a big shift in thinking, but it’s the only way that men and women are ever going to get back on the same page. Take it from a queergender person who really doesn’t feel like they have a dog in this fight. It’s just what the studies suggest and how culture is going. The saying is “some things never change,” but that simply isn’t  true. Given long enough, everything changes. And in this case, it should have changed a long time ago.

The part of me that is male is shamed by how long women have been oppressed and force into subservient roles, and I plan to fight for true equality because I genuinely believe that is is what we need to move forward.

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Because women carry a heavier burden due to periods and childbirth, equality would mean men shouldering more than 50% of the burden of household work to compensate.

Consensual Non-Monogamy in Media


I think Mayim Bailik is a perfectly fine actress and I hear she’s a passable scientist as well. That’s great. However, as a person, she has always rubbed me the wrong way. I don’t go out of my way to watch her talk. And yet, videos and stories about her come up from time to time on my social media. It’s always something horrible. She is constantly talking about ideals that went out in the 1950’s.

Example: During the #MeToo movement, she did a video that I saw reposted where she said that she had always dressed conservatively to avoid harassment. She went on to say that people weren’t nice to her because she dressed conservatively. Then, she said that obviously she was right all along because other girls trying to make it as actresses had been harassed. Her basic point? Dress like a whore and you deserve to get harassed.

It was slut-shaming, and it was disgusting. I was deeply sad that women with influence still say such shitty things.

So, when a video of her bashing my lifestyle came up in my feed the other day, I was pissed. It turns out it was an older video, but it still made me mad enough to post about. She went on and on about how unsettling she finds polyamory, and how we (poly folks) don’t have “real” relationships.

See for yourself exactly how shitty and clueless it was:

She literally tries to invalidate me and the way I live by saying that as a woman, I can’t possibly be in an open relationship without being wrong. Women, according to her, can’t possible care about anything but making babies. We need to “lean into our biology” by only having sex with men that we want to procreate with. I can’t tell you how offended I am that her narrow view of biology and relationships is being projected onto me. Plus, she acts like people in open relationships are the ones who are spreading STIs. That’s is the exact opposite of the truth.

Monogamous people are the ones who are constantly cheating by having one-night stands with strangers. If you don’t plan on an open relationship, then you cheat “by accident.” Statistically monogamy is an illusion. If you think your wife or husband doesn’t cheat on you, then statistically, you’re probably wrong. These one-night stands are how STIs are spread, because those people aren’t thinking at all about what they are doing. They are acting on instinct.

Meanwhile, people who are poly tend to be much more cautious about sex.

For example: the idea of a one-night stand with a stranger seems insane to me. I don’t need to get HIV or that flesh-eating STI going around in England. I don’t want to put my husband or any of my secondaries in danger! I have responsibilities, and I would never take that lightly.

So in the poly community, we talk about sex in mature ways and get tested before adding a new partner to our cluster. There are exceptions sometimes, but they are carefully considered exceptions, not one-night stands in a club bathroom.

Monogamous people cheat even when they are happy. And, because they are sneaking around, they are more likely to engage in irresponsible hookups that spread Sexually Transmitted Infections. The data is in: Monogamous people are spreading the STIs.

Anyway, later Maryim Bailik tried to fix her terrible video by posting this:

She does apologize for being a close-minded person. However, the way she does it is pretty rude. She says “It’s all so complicated” as if it’s too hard to understand us, so that it’s not worth it.

I get that she was doing her best to apologize for being ignorant, and I appreciate that she tried. However, she can’t really be that sorry about promoting her 1950’s values because she has always done it, and she still is.

At the end, she gets mad at us. She says we “make her feel boring” about being a person who chose to marry, be monogamous, and breed. It makes me really mad that anyone would expect me to be responsible for their choices! If she feels boring, then she should make different choices. However, she should not blame people who lead more interesting lives.

I guess I’m just tired of how we always get portrayed as immoral sluts who cannot feel love. And then, if we work hard to justify our lifestyle, then they still find a way to be down on us because we make them feel bad.

How Do We Cope?

I’ve been thinking a lot about my country, and about how hard it is to see it falling apart. I look around the world, and I see that other places have the same problems with rising income inequality and increased xenophobia. I don’t want to debate which is worse: US immigration camps or Australia’s immigrant prison island. Let’s just admit that we’re all doing it wrong.

For those of us who are kinky, this is particularly hard. They are taking down websites on the thin justification that “you could meet a prostitute” on them. We all wonder if our favorite kink sites will be next.

In addition, we see more puritanical laws going into effect. The government is seemingly bent on attacking anyone they don’t deem as “normal.” As a pansexual queergender polyamorous human, that is making me very nervous for obvious reasons. I know many of your feel the same. I have been watching a TV show called The Good Fight in which they tackle some of the issues we face in this new conservative era, but there is nothing out there that is truly representative of our struggle.

So how can we cope with this? How can we live each day in fear? How can we get past our social anxiety and our legitimate concern about being marginalized and get out of bed in the mornings?

For me, the answer is to fight back. I can’t be on the defensive. I can’t be the one always backing down. I have to be the one who sees he bad thing coming and rushes headlong at it like an idiot. That’s how I am going to cope with this.

I have always voted, but now I am pushing my friends about it. I also “came out” to my friends and family on Facebook so they would know that they know someone who is effected by this climate of hate. And, I am writing a series of romance novels to normalize kink.

Now, before you say that there are already some good books out there that portray kinky characters as normal humans, relax. I know that. But there are not enough of them. There are too many people reading “50 Shades of Grey” and thinking that is who we are. There are too many people who read the Beauty Series and think that kink without consent is sexy.

I want to lend my voice to the people who are writing about BDSM in consensual relationships. I want to write about how we slowly come into our own in the kink community after some soul-searching and some effort. So with that in mind, I’d like to tell you about The Jamie Johnson series.

It starts with a main character in a mostly vanilla relationship with only a little kink. She feels unfulfilled but unsure if she can find better (because I think we all started out that way.) In the second book she leaves her mostly vanilla relationship and experiments with a few sex clubs and stuff. And finally, in the third book, she figures out what she really wants and she finds it. As the character evolves and more kink is introduced, you can watch her grow as a person and become more confident and comfortable with who she is. It’s a process that I think any fully realized kinkster had to go through, and it humanizes us for the “normal” folks.

Obviously, I have made sure to include consent as a huge theme. I hope to show people that kink can absolutely be sexy even after a lengthy scene negotiation. I genuinely think that we are easily vilified and portrayed as “other” because people don’t understand us. This is my best attempt at combating that. And they are modeled after vanilla romance novels (of which I read 26 before starting this project to try to understand them.) This will hopefully make them palatable to vanilla people who will then come to see us as normal.

Book One: Love & The Desert
Book Two: Love & The Rose City
Book Three: Hearth & Home

The first two are on sale now on Amazon, and the third will be available in time for the holidays, so please feel free to give a friend the gift of ethical kink this year!

Lifestyle Under Threat

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It’s been two decades since I got into the kink scene for the first time, and so much has changed. Sit back, relax, and let me tell you younglings about how things were back in the day.

In the 90’s, religious groups would advertise fake kink meetups so they could prey upon anyone who showed up. It was mostly Mormons, but Christians did it too. I grew up in Arizona, and there was a kink group called Arizona Power Exchange, or APEX. They advertised their meetups with fliers at popular counter-culture hangouts like The Graffiti Shop on Mill Avenue. Unfortunately, they couldn’t stop Mormon prayer groups from putting out fliers for fake events, and then telling any “sinner” who showed up how they needed to be saved.

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This is how I came to understand that kinky people were discriminated against by society, and it’s also how I came to hate Mormons. I actually wish Hell was real so those fucks could burn in it.

However, it wasn’t just Mormons and other religious nut-balls who preyed upon us. There were a lot of physiologists who saw kink as a disease of the mind. They claimed that things like rape fantasies made you “sick” and “dangerous.” They tried to lure people into special counselling groups and get them on medication, while lying to them about how unusual they were.

The cat is out of the bag, thanks to the Internet. In a new book called Everybody Lies, Seth Stephens-Davidowitz explains that Google searches show us for who we really are, and most of us have rape fantasies and dream of violent sex. So kinky people were not persecuted for being different- as we had always been told. Rather, we were persecuted for doing something that everyone secretly wanted to do, because we were actually doing it.

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It’s ironic, because I remember fellow kinksters saying things like: “They’re just jealous; they wish they had sex like us!” Then we all laughed because it was a joke to us to imagine those bigots being in touch enough with their sexuality to negotiate a scene and play it out. And yet, it turns out it was true. They were always just jealous.

These days, BDSM is no longer in the DSM as a mental disorder. Psychologists and medical doctors are instructed to treat us normally. Sometimes, they actually do.

We got to enjoy the era of CollarMe.com and Fetlife.com and the rise of munches and fetish proms in every city. We got to enjoy kinky people simply going about our lives and being treated with only mild disdain, instead of being thrown in prison. And those younglings who came into the community during this time of openness and acceptance might not realize how dangerous it used to be to be kinky.

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However, our freedoms are under attack. Now that we are threatened, we need to remember what it was like before we were free to meet and be and who we were. We need to look back at our history, and remember that there are people in prison right now for things like having rape fantasies. (Yes, I know one. He was convicted back when kink was still seen as a disorder and we were still considered dangerous.)

They are taking down websites. They use the excuse that these websites “could be used for sex trafficking,” but we all know that is bullshit. My Facebook profile says I am a guy, and I get TONS of spam from hooker-bots on Facebook, so any website can be used for sex trafficking. If I can buy a hooker on Facebook, I can buy one anywhere (since Facebook is where all the old grannies hang out.)

In Congress, they just decided that it’s okay for states to ban gay couples from adopting. This is in spite of all the studies which prove that gay couples are often better parents than straight couples (since they don’t have their kids by accident.)

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If you are a youngling that never lived through a fake kink meetup put on by religious people who blocked the door to keep you from leaving and shouted hateful shit at you, then you might not see the writing on the wall. That is why I am telling you: Attacks on marginalized people like sex workers and gay couples are attacks on us. They are coming at us one subgroup at a time, and they are working hard to criminalize everything about who we are.

What we have built over the years is something I am so proud of. The kink community used to be full of exploitative Doms and abused women. And yet from that, we built a healthy community full of supportive networks of people. We built websites and clubs and spaces where kink could be safe. I am so proud of us and of all the things we have created for safe, sane, and consensual kinky sex.

Seeing the government begin to attack us again is terrifying. Having someone like Mike Pence in the White House is probably the scariest thing I can think of. I know everyone focuses on the buffoon in the spotlight, but he is deeply irrelevant. Pence is the one who is part of the Quiverfull Movement (a group of religious extremists whose ultimate goal is to force all women into the home and to force Christian values and straight vanilla sex on us all.) All the dangerous legislation against us is coming from Pence. And this is something we need to be talking about.

If you are kinky, then politics needs to matter to you. I know it’s easier to avoid it and to just not talk about it, but we can’t do that. We have to fight for the community that we have built, and fight against those who would take our freedom to fuck in fun ways away from us. You might think it can’t get that bad, but it was that bad twenty years ago. It can be again.

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Please vote. Please write to your elected representatives. Please talk to people about the community and how we are just normal folks like them (as opposed to terrifying criminal sinners.) Be open about who you are and how you follow laws. Remind people that CONSENT is our biggest rule.

And as an aside, I wrote a trilogy of books to humanize us. They are modeled after a vanilla romance novel (I read about 30 vanilla romance novels before writing them to get the formula right.) However, the main character is kinky. She starts out a little kinky, and then evolves into a polyamourous dominatrix. The point of the series is to teach vanilla people about consensual kink and how normal and non-threatening it is.

So, if you know a vanilla person who might need that lesson, please buy them The Jamie Johnson Trilogy. It’s not anything super-special to us kink folks (all the kink scenes are pretty tame and standard.) But that is because it’s intent is not to shock. Rather, it is to lull the vanilla folks into a sense of security because we’re just normal human beings who have a few whips and chains in our closet, and it’s not a big deal.

You probably don’t have time to write novels, but any form of activism you choose to do is equally valid. Just fight. Please. We all need to fight for our right to be kinky!

Dating Separately vs Dating Together

My husband and I live on an isolated island, so we don’t have much opportunity to date. We’re in the middle of nowhere and it’s a very small community. (Thankfully we move to Oahu at the end of this year and so this forced monogamy is almost over!)

However, when we have the chance to date (everywhere but here), we usually do it separately. He does his thing; I do my thing. And then we meet up and share thoughts and feelings together.

On rare occasions, we have been lucky enough to find someone who was interested in both of us. One of the amazing humans who we had played with when we lived in Korea came to see us recently, and we all spent a week together. And, I guess I am just thinking about how sometimes that can work out.

I mean, it’s harder.

If I date someone that my husband does not date, that is one relationship.

If he dates someone that I do not date, that is a second relationship.

And then, since we are seeing each other, that makes a total of three relationships.

However, when you have a triad, there is so much more going on. You have each individual relationship on it’s own (his with her, his with me, me with her, me with him, her with him, her with me.) But then, you also have the overall dynamic when you are together. It’s an added layer of complication that I don’t usually opt for. I mean, I like to keep things simple. Extra stuff tends to make things more complicated.

But, I just want to celebrate the fact that sometimes it works out. With this one amazing, special, beautiful unicorn, it has always worked out. It’s never awkward of weird; just happy.

Those moments when things really go well are so rare and so awesome that I am just glad, and I just wanted to give a shout out to all the people who like to date couples and who blend seamlessly into what is already going on. Thank you for existing.

The Flying Spaghetti Monster

I realize that religion is completely irrelevant to kink. Please forgive me for this post which is out of character for my blog. It’s just that I have been MIA from the blog for a bit because I have written a very silly book. Now that it is done, I would love it if you guys could help me out with spreading the word. I promise it’s worth a look.

The book is called The New Testament of The Flying Spaghetti Monster; Dinner 2.0, and it is available for free here.

It is the bible for The Unitarian Church of Pasta; a more inclusive sect of Pastafarianism than has been previously conceived. The older style of Pastafarianism favored pirate garb and a heaven that was full of strippers and beer volcanoes. The New Testament doesn’t refute any of that, but it does suggest that some folks may prefer a nice glass of scotch and women who are not paid to pretend to like them. In other words, it’s not attacking the old church, but rather, adding to it.

While it is meant to be a funny book, it is also meant to address some of the problems in the world, and ways that Pastafarians may wish to work towards solving them. Yes, there are jokes. But it is my hope that there are also some noodles of wisdom mixed in that might appeal to folks. So, if you are already a Pastafarian, please check it out. If you are not already a Pastafarian; that’s okay (nobody’s perfect!) But, there has never been a better time to check out the most delicious religion on the market.

Please add the Prophet Violet Johnson as a friend on Facebook if you can, and “like” the Unitarian Church of Pasta page. It would also be great if you could follow the church on Twitter, and on Tumblr as well, if you wouldn’t mind. You’ll be getting in on the ground floor of what is going to be the most hilarious sect of Pastafarianism yet, and I promise you won’t be disappointed.

 

Thank you so much to all of you. I know I don’t return as many e-mails as I should (but thank you for sending them!) And, I know I don’t update the blog as often as I should. But you guys are the best, and I appreciate every single one of you.