I got a request to write about some of the really good experiences I have had in the BDSM community over the years. There are a lot to choose from- of course. But it seems my favorites are the ones that I had with people just coming into the community.
I think I am somewhat indifferent to life. I don’t mean to be- and we don’t need to worry about why. However, life just kind of goes by for me, and I exist in it somewhat happily and without a lot of thought. The exception is when something make s a huge impression on someone I am with. That helps me make a memory.
So here is an example. This is a boy I played with a few years ago. He was new to the community and he hadn’t really gotten to know anyone yet. Some people who are like that are shy and hard to pull information out of. This boy was not, so I’ll call him Mr. Adventurous.
I brought up rope one week. He identified as a switch, and I told him that if he wanted to be a good Dom he should look into shibari. After all, rope play is a way to take a scene slowly, and show care and concern for your submissive while making something beautiful at the same time. It’s very elegant and sexy. I explained that to Mr. Adventurous.
The next week, he turned up with a ton of rope (see picture above) and showed me how he had learned several different types of knots and a few cool wrap methods like a basket weave. He had watched Youtube videos and practiced on himself! Yes, that’s right. I said he practiced on himself. He sat there all week fascinated with the idea of rope play, and tried various ties on his legs. How cool is that? He even researched online to find good places to buy rope for bondage and ordered some. (A good place for that, by the way, is Twisted Monk).
I have to admit, there’s nothing like a brilliant guy who can obsess over something until he gets it right. He was so excited to try rope play that it made me excited about it- and I usually don’t have the patience for such an elaborate and time-consuming craft.
I have brought a lot of people into the community over the years. Yes, that’s mostly because I like to p lay with younger men and women. I only feel as young as the person who polishes my boots, after all. But of all the people I have ever introduced to the community, this man was the very best and most impressive. I have never met anyone more eager to learn and more excited to try new fun stuff.
So the moral of this story is: If you want to get into the community, remember to try to seek out new experiences. Don’t wait for someone to explain every little thing to you! Do your own research and ask questions and give new things a try! Life is way more fun when you go out and grab it, instead of waiting for it to come to you.