I recently made a comment about Sub Drop, and was met with a blank look. I thought this was a term that everyone in the kink community knew, so I was surprised to find that it is not. Since it seems to be needed, here is a brief explanation.
Submitting to another person is usually a very emotional experience for anyone. This is sometimes part of an overall relationship, or sometimes part of a stand-alone scene. However, going into sub space and allowing oneself to be vulnerable is very intense even if there is not a deep emotional connection (or any connection at all) between partners.
Obviously this is different for every person, and so it is very hard to describe the feeling. However, a friend of mine once said; “It takes a great deal of courage to submit to and trust another person.” I believe that is true.
Because submission is such an emotional experience, it’s important not to finish a scene and then part ways immediately. Of course, every scene should end with after-care, where you hold the submissive and let them gradually come out of sub space.
Even when the after care is over, the submissive is usually still emotionally vulnerable, and so it is best not to leave them alone if possible. If the submissive must be left alone, they should be encouraged to have a friend come over and be with them, just in case.
In situations where the submissive is left alone, they often experience something called “Sub Drop,” where their already vulnerable emotional state overwhelms them and they become extremely depressed. This is something that a Dom or Domme must do their best to avoid, as this can make the submissive adverse to future scenes, and can be very hard on them.
Remember, if a person is brave enough to submit to you, it is your responsibility to respect that courage and to do your best to be good to your submissive. Without submissives (and switches who chose to submit), none of us would able to enjoy our kink, which is to have someone to dominate.