My husband and I live on Guam right now. It’s a tiny island in the middle of the Pacific Ocean, and it doesn’t have much for a kink community or really any community. I have met some people here who want to “get into kink” but haven’t had the chance to experience anything. So, I want to write a bit about planning your vacations around kink.
Twice now I have gone to Arizona just for a weekend to attend a Horns and Halos Fetish Prom. Unfortunately, after the 10 year anniversary, they stopped putting on the proms. However, if you’re into suspension or any of those aspects of pain and endurance, Life Suspended is still going strong in Phoenix, and Cupcake happens once a month.
I used to love traveling to Portland for Club Sesso, but it’s currently in limbo while the owners decide if they want to meet current city building codes or not. However, there is still The Velvet Rope, in addition to private dungeons like Meadhall, which you would need to be invited to via the dungeon’s page on fetlife.com.
Up in Seattle there is the very best place you could possible go if you are new to kink; a place called the CSPC. With a kink library, dungeon space, and learning annex, the Center for Sex Positive Culture is a great resource to learn about kink, attend workshops, and try out a real dungeon environment.
Of course there are other sex clubs and dungeons around the world. My husband and I always enjoy a visit to Club Desire in Seoul. But listing every kink spot in the world won’t do you any good. The secret is to pick a city that you want to visit, change your location on fetlife to that city, and join some groups. Start talking to people. And then plan your dates around when they have events going on.
It doesn’t matter what city you choose. What matters is that you plan ahead to get hooked in to the kink community there, and make sure you can mix in kink events with your vanilla sightseeing. Before I went to Paris I looked up Burlesque shows. Before I went to Thailand I looked for a dungeon but settled for an eel show at a brothel (who would have thought there would be virtually no kink scene in Thailand?!?) And every time I want to go to a new place, I always include kink into my planning.
If you are from a desolate island like Guam, make sure that you get the most out of your vacations. Don’t just fly home to see mom in Atlanta. Plan to visit the Atlanta Dungeon while you are there!
We are a community, and as such, you are sure to find one or two people willing to show you around their scene when you are visiting. That’s just how we are.
Even if you’re from a place with a vibrant kink scene, that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t check out dungeons in other cities when you are visiting.
NOTE: Do be very careful to read the fine print. My husband and I decided to avoid a kink club in Boston while we were there, even though we would have loved to meet some of the locals. This is because the fine print on their website said that they live stream from every room in the dungeon for some porn website. I don’t want to be outed and I am sure that you don’t either. So, always make sure the club checks cell phones at the door and has a strict “no cameras” policy before you enter any kink establishment. Also, fuck Boston for taking a wonderful community of people and trying to sell them as porn.