One More Thailand Post

The Airport in Bangkok

The Airport in Bangkok

A while ago I wrote about looking for the kink scene in Thailand. Sadly, I didn’t find kink.

What I did find was all the things Bangkok is famous for. Yes, there are huge markets full of people selling fake college degrees and scorpions to eat. There are lady-boys and prostitutes and wives for sale. And, there are ping pong ball shows and various other strange diversions.

So one hot, sweaty night in Bangkok, I was on Khoa San Road. It’s a famous spot where tourists gather, and where there are a lot of bars and clubs. A tuk-tuk driver came up to me and showed me a menu. It only had a few things on it. There was “Fish in Pussy,” “Eel in Pussy,” “Smoking Pussy,” and a few others.

I should mention that when I came to Thailand, I had no plan for what I would do. I showed up with the idea that I would go where the day took me. Sometimes I followed tourists around. Sometimes I hung out with locals. But every day, I went wherever the day took me. When the tuk-tuk driver showed me the menu, I decided the day was taking me to see a sex club.

Before I continue I want you to know that I feel really bad for going to a sex club in Thailand. I used to work at a Thai restaurant in the USA with a mail order bride. And I read Night Market to learn more about the sex trade in Thailand. I feel awful supporting such a huge, terrible industry. I am a bad person for going to see a ping pong show, and I do know that. Okay; so now that that is cleared up, here’s what happened…

We got to the club and the tuk-tuk driver told me he would stay outside. I walked into the building he gestured to, and it looked a little like a strip club. At the moment I walked in, there was a girl on stage with ping pong balls. An older lady came up and asked me what I wanted to see. I told her (from the menu) that I wanted to see an Eel show. I paid her 600 baht, which is about $20 US. It doesn’t sound like a lot, but it is. I was living very comfortably off of 100 baht a day for most of my time in Thailand.

The older lady took me to a private room and a woman came in with eels in her pussy. I mean; I didn’t know that. You couldn’t see them or anything. She was wearing a stripper-like outfit and she just pointed to the chair and told me to sit. Then she got on the bed, spread her legs, and pushed live eels out of her pussy.

You know, I was going to go into details about the eels… but it really ruined hentai for me and it was pretty tragic. The whole experience kind of made me sad. I felt really bad for the girls that worked there.

I guess the moral of this story is; don’t go to a brothel unless you can handle it. I am still feeling far to guilty about that night to describe it in too much detail. I’m not even sure the girl was 18. She looked really young. So… yeah. That’s the trouble I got into in Thailand.

Trying to get in Trouble in Thailand

Inside a temple in Chang Mai

Inside a temple in Chang Mai

So I planned a trip to Thailand because a long time ago in a land far away, I promised a woman who took care of me and was kind to me that I would go there some day. Before I went, I hit up the Bangkok group on fetlife.com to ask what kinky stuff I could find there. I didn’t get any responses though- so make of that what you will.

Anyway, after several weeks I have to tell you; there’s not much kinky stuff to see in Bangkok.

Yes, there are ping pong ball shows (and no I do not have pictures because they don’t allow cameras in the sex clubs- but I will write about my trip to see a pussy with eels in it at some point.) And there are hookers of all kinds. You could buy a wife too, if you wanted. But then, you don’t need to come here to do that. They have websites to order them online. In fact, the woman who I promised I would come here was a mail order bride herself.

So if you want a Thai wife, or a ping pong ball show for tourists, or a ladyboy to do whatever with, you can find it in Bangkok.

Also, you can find about a zillion buddhas because they call it the land of a thousand buddhas for a reason.

A temple in Bangkok

A temple in Bangkok

I tried my hardest to get into trouble. I went on a date with a Hell’s Angel in Chang Mai and asked him to take me to the Mother Of All Dive Bars or anywhere skivvy and fun.  The dive bar was certainly the biggest dive I’ve been in after traveling the world, so I’ll give him that. And yet… no sex shops with whips and chains. No dungeons. And when I asked about kink, everyone just kind of looked at me and then said:  “you mean like a ladyboy?”

I’ll keep searching. I haven’t given up yet! But I have to say, I’ve never had this much trouble finding kinky stuff in any other country in the world. If you know of any kinky spots anywhere in Thailand, you tell me in the comments, okay?

Inside yet another temple; this one in the South

Inside yet another temple; this one in the South