Rope Bondage

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Lately, I have been asked a lot about how to get better at rope bondage. I must admit, rope bondage isn’t something I do. I have talked before about how I prefer gear ties and cuffs. However, I have nothing but respect for those who practice this noble art.

Because I can’t tell you a lot about how to do it, I wanted to give you some resources:

The Two Knotty Boys are wonderful! I saw them do a show at the CSPC in Seattle, and I can’t tell you how impressed I was. They move with a style and grace that is rivaled by few.

My other recommendation isĀ Twisted Monk. They can give you good ideas. If you visit their page, you’ll find lots of useful instructional videos that you can watch and practice along with. If you want to learn the art of rope bondage, these are some men who can help.

Please remember to keep safety in mind. One of the reasons I don’t do rope bondage is because I worry about missing the signs and causing damage to my rope bunny. Remember to keep something handy to cut ropes fast, just in case a toe starts turning blue!

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Minimalist Kink

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I have said before that I don’t have a dungeon room in my house. I love visiting dungeons, but at home I tend to be a minimalist when it comes to kink. I think bending someone over a couch is every bit as good as a spanking bench, and tying someone to the back side of a couch is perfectly effective as well.

Of course, some people think the kink furniture really adds to the effect. That’s great too!

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In addition to using perfectly normal items like a couch for kinky purposes, you can also re-purpose everyday items as toys. Of course it’s wonderful to have a custom collar made for your submissive. And I have written about different collar options before. However, if you’re on a budget, there’s no reason not to pick up a dog collar at the pet store. You don’t need fancy things to be kinky unless it helps your mindset. Meanwhile, if you already have the mindset, anything at all can be kinky.


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Paper clips can be used as nipple clamps. I suppose they can actually be more painful than the clamps you buy at stockroom.com. They may not look fancy, but they certainly get the job done.

Finally, many people spend thousands on professional BDSM furniture. That’s okay if you can afford it and if you have room for it. However, if you want to make a simple suspension rig, Home Depot can provide everything you need. My friend made a rig out of pipe, and uses it frequently to suspend people. Best of all, it can be broken down and stored so that it’s out of the way (in case you have kids, vanilla friends, etc…)

So no matter what you’re kink is, remember that being creative is always an option.

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Play Suggstions

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I get a lot of requests for suggestions on what to do with a submissive once they are tied up. To start, before you tie them up, it’s nice to start with petting, hair pulling, neck and ear biting, and running your hands along their body in a firm way. This starts putting them into sub space and getting them in the mood.

If you use rope to tie your submissive and need any help with that, Twisted Monk is the best! They have instructional videos and helpful hints.

For me, I am lazy and like to use gear ties, because they are quick and easy. Also, the rubber is soft and doesn’t leave any marks, but the steel cable inside is strong and nearly impossible to break.

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If possible, I prefer a hard point in a doorway or a low arch. This is because I enjoy having the submissive’s hands out of the way, with access to both their front size and back size. A hard point would be something simple like an eye hook screwed deep into a stud in your wall.

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You can also tie their arms in front of them (in which case you may want to tie their arms and feet together and then to each other just for fun.) Or, you can tie their arms in back. Depending on how you tie them, you will have access to different parts of their body, so think about which parts you want to play with first, and remember to switch it up a few times during the night so they don’t get sore from being tied in one position too long.

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When you have their hands above them or in front of them, that is a good time to try flogging and spanking. For flogging, remember to use a figure eight motion, and to start light and build in intensity as you go. Be careful to aim for the thickest fleshiest bits so that you won’t accidentally wrap the tails of the flogger around the submissive’s body, as this can amplify the force and cause the flogger to cut into the flesh.

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For spanking, you also want to be sure to focus on the fleshy parts. I think it’s fun to ask submissives to either count how many times I hit them, or to ask to be hit again after each stroke. I like to think that kink is as much in a person’s head as it is outside. So, if they have to say “Thank you Mistress, may I have another?” after each stroke, it adds to the intensity of the experience.

 

 

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If your scene involves sex, it’s good to change positions after play. For females, I like to use a vibrator on them (if they can orgasm from that) and if not, use my fingers or tongue to get them off. Once a female has an orgasm, they are much more open to different ideas. If your submissive is male, you wouldn’t want to let them have an orgasm because men tend to fall asleep after. But for females, you will definitely get more enthusiastic participation in any scene if you make sure they have an orgasm first.

Remember, talk to your submissive about what gets them off! Don’t just assume. Women are all very different, and this can sometimes make it a struggle to please them. That’s why you need to communicate. If you want to try some creative toys to help you, I recommend Doctor Exreme for some off-the-beaten-path ideas.

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Remember that before sexual contact it is always a good idea to get an STD test from them first, because many STDs are spread through skin-to-skin contact and so a condom will not be enough to protect you (unless it’s one of those full-body condoms from Eastern Europe.)

Also remember that not all scenes include sex; some are just play. Make sure your submissive agreed to sexual contact before you initiate it.

And finally, these are just a few ideas, although you can also have a lot of fun with butt plugs, riding crops, and canes; to name a few things. Whatever you do, as always, keep it safe, sane, and consensual.

New Idea

Gear Ties

Gear Ties

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I like rope as much as the next person, but sometimes it takes too much time. That’s why I love these Gear Ties I discovered awhile ago. They’re metal with a soft rubber outside, and they work so well for tying a person quickly.

If you’re really into rope then I guess they might not be your thing. And leather cuffs are prettier if you’re worried about that. Of course the best is some awesome bondage furniture to play on with leather straps. BUT if you can’t get any of those things, some of these works great!