Munches

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My favorite munch that I ever went to was in Portland. We got together to make ginger bread houses. I had actually never made a ginger bread house before, and I really had fun with it. The person throwing the munch had arranged to buy kits for each of us and candy (which we reimbursed her for) and everyone brought snacks to make it kind of a pot luck.

It is still a really cool memory because I like to try new things, enjoy pleasant conversation with new people, and feel accomplished at the end of it all.

I have not ever made a ginger bread house since, but I am really glad to say that I was able to do it once in my life. And it was even with cool people!

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So my husband and I are going on vacation, and I was trying to think of somewhere to have a munch while on our trip. I looked at the Raccoon cafe (only two sad little raccoons) and all the bars and restaurants I like, but here’s the problem with that:

It’s loud in a restaurant, bar, or club.

I always felt like the point of a munch was to talk to people and get to know them. I thought it was to introduce friends, and make new friends.

It’s hard to do that in a loud and crowded environment.

Anyway, it made me think of how I would rather go hike to a temple and sit around in a circle chatting than go to a bar and scream over music.

What is your favorite place to hold a munch?

 

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Reaching Out

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My husband and I are planning a trip to South Korea in October as a vacation. We are always interested in meeting new and interesting people, so if you are going to be in South Korea in the last two weeks of October, let me know and we’ll plan to meet up.

ladyvioletemail@gmail.com

When we travel, we always try to go to kink places in that area, so if anyone is aware of a fetish club in Korea, let us know. We have been to Club Desire, and to hook up clubs, but a dungeon would be lovely.

Also, we will try to attend at least one munch while we are there.

Obviously we are going for vacation, so we’ll be hiking in Seoraksan and visiting Jeju Loveland and such, but it’s important to us to try and work a little kink into every vacation. So if you have ideas, let us know!

(As always, if you are planning a trip to Guam, let us know!)

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An Orgy I Went To

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So while I was on vacation I went to an orgy. (I also went ice fishing and to an amusement park, but I guess you guys don’t want to hear about that, huh?)

First: It’s kind of hard to define what an orgy is. This was 6 couples (or 12 people) who started out just switching partners with each other and ended up sort of just having sex with everything around. I have no idea if it was planned or not, because my pet and I were the only English speakers there. It seemed unplanned, so I’m going to assume it just started out with some couples at a sex club and ended with a more orgy-like setting.

When I told my friends I was at an orgy, they had several questions. So I’ll write this post as a question and answer, since it seems like a fair format to do this topic in.

1. How many people did you have sex with?

Um… I’m not really sure. It’s all kind of a blur. I’m pretty sure that I had sex with all of them. But you know, it’s a dimly lit room and not everyone is memorable. It’s not like we got to exchanging names or talking about our lives with each other.

2. Was it fun?

A lot of it was fun, yes. I had some really interesting sex. And of course, it was all Asians, so I got to be the hot foreign girl with the big, blue eyes and the shaved pussy. Asian men go nuts over a shaved pussy. They all want to pet it and rub lube on it and stuff because Asian women don’t usually shave.

It was also fun from the perspective of watching my pet, which I always enjoy doing. I don’t mean to brag, but my pet has 6-pack abs, a beautifully toned body, and a huge cock. He is way hotter than the guys in porn. And yes, I do know how lucky I am. So watching him walk around, watching him fuck, and anything else I ever watch him do is just awesome. And anyway he gets this “sex smile” that is so brilliant and lights up my whole world.

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3. What about STDs?

This is a very valid question. Yes, I do worry about STDs. That’s why I use condoms. All the guys were annoyed about this because they weren’t using them with the other girls. But I insisted and they complied. My pet had the same experience with the girls, who saw him reach for a condom and said they didn’t like it, but he put it on anyway.

Still, STDs are spread from skin-to-skin contact and they are caught from oral sex as well as vaginal and anal sex. It’s totally possible to get something even using condoms and dental dams and being careful. So when I got home to the USA I went and got a full STD panel. Some of the tests require a wait of a few weeks before you can take them, so always ask your doctor if it’s too soon to take certain tests. My doctor thought it was silly of me to wait for the AIDS test, because he said it’s rare that it’s takes longer than a week or two to show up in your blood. But he agreed that it’s okay to be cautious and told me to come back in a few weeks for that one.

I do this all the time. I have been tested for STDs at least 40 times in my life. The tests have not always come back negative, but everything I have ever caught was easy to treat. Yes, I worry every single time.

But here’s the thing; I am not willing to live my life according to fears of what might happen. I am as careful as anyone can be given my lifestyle, and I am accepting of the fact that it might not be enough. I fly in planes even though they sometimes crash. I drive a car even though sometimes car accidents happen. I went skydiving even though sometimes parachutes don’t open. And I went to an orgy even though I might get an STD.

Some of my friends feel that this is irresponsible behavior. Maybe so. But I like sex, and I like unique situations involving sex. I feel that the risk is small, and that it is worth it. You may make a different choice, and that is okay too.

4. How do I get to be part of an orgy?

It’s funny because the ones I have been part of were surprise situations. I think it usually is. I don’t think there are a lot of planned orgies. (Though there are a lot of swingers clubs for older married folks.) I do not think I can answer this question. All I can say is; you increase your chances when you hang out in certain types of places around certain types of people.

5. Were there any negative parts?

Yes, there was one. A sort of overzealous guy was watching me and another guy have sex, and he tried to stick his fingers inside of me (while the other guy was inside of me). He had finger nails, and they cut me. This was actually when I tagged out of the orgy and left everyone to their fun.

6. Would you do it again?

Yes! With the exception of the very end, it was actually a lot of fun. I know it’s uncharacteristic for a girl to admit to even liking sex, let alone promiscuous orgy sex. But, it was fun! There was one point where I had 3 guys around me all playing with me at once and I felt like a total sex goddess. It was just like being in a porn. I love sex that feels just like a porn.

I'm including a frog orgy at the end because I have a terrible sense of humor and because the picture made me laugh

I’m including a frog orgy at the end because I have a terrible sense of humor and because the picture made me laugh

A Very Personal Update

Passport, and money!

Passport, and money!

I might be writing this more for myself than for you. My thoughts are less ordered than they usually are, due to a lot of major life-changes that happened all at once. I need to straighten out my head.

First, I live in Portland Oregon now. It is a wonderful city and I really enjoy it. It also gives e a chance to be near someone I have been dating for more than 10 years, and I am really enjoying that. He’ll hate me for this- but I’m going to refer to him as “Mr. Pretty” because of a nickname from when we were much younger people.

He and I didn’t start out kinky. At first, it was just a very passionate relationship between two people who had everything in common, while having none of the same characteristics. We grew up in small towns only a few miles apart. We both moved to the same desert and lived through our teen years there. We always ran in the same circles, and we even got matching tattoos at one point. Of course, we are nothing alike in terms of personality. He’s shy, socially awkward, and more capable with machines than with relationships. I’m out-going, popular, and great at relationships.

We have loved each other our whole adult lives, and adding kink to things only made it more exciting. Having him close to me makes everything better, because moving to a new place and a new part of the country is a huge change. It is smoothed over a lot by having someone here to cuddle up to and love.

From a trip Mr. Pretty and I took for my birthday.

From a trip Mr. Pretty and I took for my birthday.

Second, I had to move away from my very favorite Pet. He and I are two of a kind with the same views on monogamy, sex in general, relationships, and everything else. We have a really great bond, in terms of things we have in common and basically the same personality (with a few tweaks here and there.)

I was very excited to spend 6 weeks in South Korea with him this summer, visiting Club Desire and going to Fetish Play Parties with our friends. I wish I could have stayed, but circumstances won’t allow us to even think about living together for another year. And that’s okay. He’s in my chat window every day, and I know that some connections are too deep to be broken by time and space. I look forward to our future adventures.

Love lanterns in Korea

Love lanterns in Korea

Third, I am living with the family of someone I dated 2 years ago when I was in Korea, and who I wrote about previously as Mr. Bond. Being here, in his old room, I think of him every day when I wake up and every night when I fall asleep. Our relationship wasn’t that long, and it was ages ago, But… some things really haunt you.

Our first date was more than a day long. We met at a bar, in a nice public setting. We talked for hours before moving to a quieter and move private hookah lounge, and then eventually to my house. Most of my first dates don’t end at my place-but the really good ones do!

I’ll never forget that feeling of instant connection and instant emotion. I’ll never forget how happy I was, or how devastated I was when he moved to Georgia right after my birthday two years ago. For letting me borrow his family, and for being such an intense moment in my life, I will forever be grateful to Mr. Bond. I think I’ll always be in love with him.

At the family's beach house in Seaside. I love living with them.

At the family’s beach house in Seaside. I love living with them.

And then there’s my ex. All of the boys above are people I wouldn’t describe as “exes” because I am still in love with them and we never broke up or fought. But my ex and I are a whole other kettle of fish. We broke up, and I slunk away to Asia with my tail between my legs. It really messed my world up for a little bit.

So he asks if we can go to dinner when I move back to the United States. And dinner turns into hanging out, which turns into a road trip up the entire West Coast. And it turns out he’s changed about as much as a person can. I will respect his privacy, but I must say that the whole “people don’t change” thing is bullshit. Some people change into a COMPLETELY different person, and Mr. Ex did that.

It used to be that I hung out with him because I got to hear about the latest in Science and Engineering from him and the other guys working at his lab. I am a science geek to the extreme and being around so many smart people was blissful. But Mr. Ex was an uptight person with about a million personal hangups. And now he’s a great guy. Some changes were big enough that I know we’ll never date again, but I think I made a friend this summer that I will have for the rest of my life, and I am happy about that.

There is nothing in the whole world like an American Road Trip...

There is nothing in the whole world like an American Road Trip…

Then of course, there were the girls. I got to see my Pretty Little Princess, to fuck several girls at Club Desire, and to have sex with a very sweet girl we’ll call Darling Nicky. I enjoyed the hell out of all the women who let me play with them this summer, but it did inspire me to write about how women are too self-conscious. I stand by that. Maybe my wording wasn’t perfect or I rambled too much in that post. But the point remains: women needs to learn not to seek validation in being skinny or having the perfect body. Sure, those things are nice, but it’s not all that matters.

Random amusing things I saw this summer...

Random amusing things I saw this summer…

So now I am settling in to a new life and a new job that will last at least a year. I am back in the Untied States for the time being, and I am enjoying speaking my native language and learning some new stuff.

This summer was too intense to really sum up in a single post. I should give shouts out to my brother in Korea and to all the people who helped me along the way with places to stay, company, and great parties. I added a few new stamps to my passport, tore apart the drive train on a car, and really just did a crazy amount of cool things that I may never get around to writing about. But the things I really want you all to take away from this is: Thank you! To all of you who love me and help make my life the awesome adventure that it is, I am so much more grateful than you will ever know. You guys make my life so wonderful, and I hope you all know how much I care.

Peace and love to you all.

Peace and love to you all.

Directions to Seoul’s Best Secret; “Club Desire”

flickr photo by said&done - http://www.flickr.com/photos/faraz27989/388890852/

I haven’t been writing much about my weekly adventures, because I spent my summer traveling and I’m still getting settled in my new home. I have been SO BUSY!

However, my summer was really wild and I’ll give you one detail for now. The best part of it was getting to visit Club Desire in Seoul, South Korea one more time with my favorite pet. I realize I’ve never given very detailed information before (since I was always writing about the sex). So, now to tell you how to get there yourself:

Club Desire is located in Gangnam, which is a fancy neighborhood that is sort of like the Beverly Hills of Seoul. I’m sure you’ve heard of Gangnam because Psy made it famous with a song he wrote to make fun of the style-over-substance culture there. (If you think you’re sick of that song and you’re living in the USA, I promise you, you have no idea how much worse it was living in Korea when it came out.)

Anyway, to get to Club Desire, first, you have to make a reservation before you go. If you don’t get someone who speaks English the first time, try again later or have a Korean-speaking friend call for you.  The number is 010-2473-8433. You can visit their website if you speak Korean, but if you are a foreigner I’m afraid it’s not much help.

A business card from the club

A business card from the club

To get there, you take the line 7 subway to the Gangnam-Gu office stop. Go out exit 3. Walk straight out of the subway, and turn right at the first road. You will walk a bit up a hill, then go left at the first road. Then you’ll be walking downhill. On the right side of the road, look for a small sign that says “Bar S Live.” It looks a little like the entrance to an apartment building, and the area is a tiny bit sketchy. Up a few stairs, you’ll see a pad with a button to push; like an old-school apartment buzzer.

Push the button and say the name that you gave when you made your reservation. They will buzz you in. Then you’ll walk down into a basement. Go down to the bar, and pay to get a drink set. The prices are listed by 10,000, as per Koreans way of writing prices. This means that if you order a Jack Daniels set for “16,” you will pay 160,000 Korean Won.

After you pay for your drink set, you will be given a key and asked to put everything in a locker. You can keep condoms, lube, sex toys, and cigarettes with you. You can also keep some money or your whole wallet if you really think it’s necessary. I find it’s best to stuff as much of your clothes and belongings in the locker as you can, so none of it gets in your way while you’re having sex. Things get knocked over, glass gets broken, and it’s best to keep personal belongs out of harm’s way.

Of course, the main reason they want everything in a locker is to keep you from having any cameras or recording devices while you are there. Famous people visit this club, as do well-respected pillars of the community. No one wants their face to end up on a sex tape. If you’re really worried you can wear one of the masks hanging by the entrance to make it harder to recognize your face. But in my experience, Koreans are very respectful of rules, and of privacy.

Things to remember: It’s encouraged that you ask the bartender to talk to a couple before trying to swing with them. And it is all couples, so bring a partner. Sometimes they have wrist bands of different colors to indicate different preferences. If you’re unsure of any of the rules, ask the bar tender. If you do switch, what out! Many of the Koreans there have not seemed to think condoms were important. I would urge you all to remember that they really, really are. And of course, try to be polite because if you are a foreign person there, you are representing all of us, so don’t be an asshole!

Pet and I had a great time. We encounter three girls who squirted, were poured champagne by strangers, and all sorts of other cool stuff. I may write about it when I have a moment to really immerse myself in the memory. For now, I thought I’d make this an educational post for those who hope to visit a Korean sex club.

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